...an open letter to God

Dear God,

I know that I should be thanking you for the things we deem simple but I don't really feel like it. I know that you are the Creator, and that you are capable but when I look around at my current situation, I find it hard to believe that things can change. I pray. I've been patient. Seems as though for every good thing I do, I get kicked in the nuts twice with a steel toed boot. I'm feeling down and out. Looks like the nice guy is finishing last.

I know what your Word says. I believe in the Bible, but I can't eat it. I'm hungry. The Bible isn't paying my car note, filling up my gas tank, or putting a roof over my head. I know I sound ungrateful but I'm not. You woke me up this morning and I am alive with a reasonable portion of health and strength. I'm thankful for that, but honestly, it's hard to focus on the spiritual when there is so much lacking in the natural. I'm just looking for you to make some things happen. I try to be the best person I can be, but that just doesn't seem to be enough. Even in doing all the right things, I get the short end of the stick. I'm not gonna lie, I could pray a little more, but so could half the Earth.

What I need from you right now is a miracle. I am tired of hearing people say that You can 'fix it' or that they are praying for me. Are You hearing these alleged prayers cause one of two things are happening here. Either these people aren't really praying or You are not listening. Now which one is it?

I want to be faithful to you God, but these situations that you have allowed me to be in make it quite hard to focus. When your stomach is growling cause you haven't eaten today, or your wondering were your going to sleep tonight, it kind of makes it hard to want to go to someones judgemental church to lay down your burdens.

That's another thing. What is up with these alleged 'saints of God'. These folks ain't no more saintly than a stripper sliding down a pole. I'm not looking for the flaws but all I see is a bunch of people faking and prostituting your Word. I thought the church was a place that people could get help when they needed it, like the hospital. Seems to me that this is not the case, in a lot of churches I've been to lately which further adds to my discontent. I don't see people lining up to visit the hospital when they are well cause it's the cool thing to do. Why is it that Your people expect perfection when you walk into the church? Since when did Your house become an exclusive club, everyones wondering.

Look God, I love you and I know you love me, but please hear what I am saying. Life is HARD. I believe in You and Your Word and when I pray, I expect results, just like you expect me to pray and worship You. These are just my thoughts, but You knew them before I was even created. I implore you to look at me, and make me better. Help me to look past the wrong that others are committing in Your name and help me to be a better Christian. In the end, it's not gonna be about what kind of car you have, or who you know, or what denomination you are, but is your name written in the Book of Life. Lord, I pray that you just have a little mercy...

Signed,

Weary Christian...